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Subcultural Labels and the Silly Things They Make People Do

I have broached this topic before, but because of its scope it does bear revisiting.

It’s prevalent in an awful lot of cultures and across many languages, probably because it’s how we as humans make society at large easier to understand. We assign labels to groups of people. They could be political (liberal, conservative, etc) or they could be cultural (hipster, yuppie, jock, nerd, hippie, emo, etc), but they are there to group people of similar interests or pursuits.

That in and of itself isn’t a bad thing. What is a bad thing is when you identify yourself based on those labels, rather than letting those labels idenfity something about you.

For instance, let’s say you are an athlete. You play a sport. This gets you labeled as a jock. Now let’s say that included in that jock stereotype is the fact that jocks are meatheads. Are you then going to act like a meathead because it’s expected of that label? You’d be surprised at how many people do this without thinking.

The mentality goes from “I play sports, therefore I’m a labeled as a jock” to “I am labeled as a jock, therefore I play sports.” The latter is just unhealthy and, well, stupid.

You could argue that maybe it’s peer pressure: jocks hang out with other jocks and maybe they goad each other into behaving like jerks. My response would then be: why do they feel the pressure to act as jerks as a group? Don’t all groups have their good guys and their bad guys?

Now, the cynic or bitter high schooler in you might argue that jocks really were that bad and were the worst, but now consider any other subcultural label. Do you suppose all those people really act that way because they want to, or do they act that way because the label makes others expect them to?

Let’s expand on this some more: how do you define a label? There are an awful lot of people out there who define certain (or all) labels in an incredibly unhealthy way.

I witnessed a survey being taken on an online forum. That survey asked people what the definition of the word “nerd” was. (My answer was that a nerd was someone who was deeply devoted to or extremely interested in a specific subject, to the point where they will go out of their way to understand it in excruciating detail.)

A significant majority answered that nerds were brainy, smart, into geeky subjects or hobbies like maths or science or computers, and, most prevalent, “uncool.” Let me reiterate: this was a survey taken on an online forum that is about comic books and videogames. They said this about what they view to be themselves.

Even more fascinating was that, when asked what the “opposite” of nerd was, they answered “jock.”

See, here’s the thing. I play sports, but I’m also pretty nerdy. Why can’t a person be both things? More importantly, why do you only have to have one label, or a group of labels that are predestined to be grouped together?

Why can’t you be a nerdy hipster or an emo jock? Why are we even using these words at all? Sure, human habit means grouping people makes them easier to understand, but I think a lot of people tend to forget that it’s really just a giant Venn Diagram with overlaps everywhere.

There are no “opposites” or “mutually exclusives.” And perhaps delving deeper into the subject, people shouldn’t be doing something to make them less of another, less desirable label (such as playing sports to make you less of a nerd). And you’d be naive if you truly believed people didn’t do this.

My point is this: if you want to label yourself as something, that’s fine. But that cannot and should not be all that you are. By that same token, other people are not just one label.

I do understand that this sort of subcultural labeling is most common in adolescents, but consider this: are you a Republican/Democrat/Liberal/Conservative because you feel a certain way on a certain issue… or do you feel a certain way on a certain issue BECAUSE you are a Republican/Democrat/Liberal/Conservative?

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  • 2 years ago
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The Truth About Long Distance Relationships

You see it everywhere in American media. “Long distance relationships never work.” “Long distance is the wrong distance.” It wouldn’t even be so bad if they were just expressing a personal view, because that’s fair enough: some people have had poor experiences with LDRs. My problem here is simply that in American media (and I single out “American” only because I’ve only really seen it there), they preach those quips as though they were truths. Like a moral of the story.

And that irks me to no end.

I have extensive experience with long distance relationships. All of my past relationships have had a long distance component. Some started with a distance, some started in person and experienced periods of distance. I am also the product of a sucessful long distance relationship. Point is: I know what I’m talking about.

Long distance is just another way to date people. Think about it this way. You meet someone in a bar and date them for a while, but it doesn’t work out. You meet someone else in a bar and, again, it doesn’t work out. Would you then be of the mind that meeting people in bars is a terrible way to meet someone for a relationship?

By that same token, let’s say you take a date to an amusement park. The relationship doesn’t work out. Let’s say you do the same with three more prospectives, but none of those relationships end up working out. Would you then say that taking dates to amusement parks is a dealbreaker?

Here’s the thing: everyone’s failures outnumber their successes. You only have to get it right once. And because humans are genetically wired to bitch about something bad more than they are to gush about something good, people will always highlight the worst experience they ever had in an LDR, meeting someone in a bar, or taking them to an amusement park.

Now, to be clear, I would never recommend an LDR to someone. My point is that I would not dissuade someone from an LDR simply because of the distance. I might tell someone to think twice if that person is jealous, untrusting, needy, and lacking an internet connection, sure, but I would not tell someone to walk away from an LDR just because of the distance.

I’m not going to tell you how to survive, navigate, or maintain an LDR. Not here, anyway. I have other projects that address that. But I will tell you here to stop assuming that an LDR is always going to be a bad idea because of the distance. Just stop it. You are insulting all the couples who DID make it work, all because you (or a friend) couldn’t make an LDR work when you also couldn’t make every other relationship aside from the one you’re in now work (and hey, there’s no guarantee this one will work, either).

Trigger: WEBCAM

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  • 2 years ago
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Flags

Furthering my familiarity with a new culture, Australia Day, 26 January, was an interesting experience. It is standard to kick back, host a barbecue (pool optional), and listen to Triple J’s Hottest 100 (of the previous year). You spend the day with the radio on while hanging out, all to varying degrees of intoxification, volume, and shenanigans. Discussion of sports optional. It’s all wrapped up by watching fireworks in the evening, and you then try your best to sober up before work the next day.

It speaks volumes of Australian culture, really, as compared to other countries’ national days. Many countries feature parades, fancy speeches, ceremonies, standing up and pretending to sing along to the national anthem when you don’t actually know the words, reciting your country’s pledge (again, more lip-syncing than actual recitation), bluster, and the like. Independence Day in the US is largely similar to your typical Australia Day but let’s just go ahead and admit that there’s just a heap more fireworks and flag-waving in the American side of things.

And there we find the crux of the matter: flags. This past Australia Day (and perhaps more before it, I don’t know, I just got here last February), there has been some heated discussion over changing the Australian Flag.

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  • 2 years ago
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